Living in alignment

When you live in alignment everything starts to change and change quickly.

Don’t do something that isn’t making you happy.

Don’t do something that isn’t resonating with your soul.

Your day to day determines your mindset.

When you lower your vibration, you lower your potential.

Live in alignment and let life be in the flow.

 

 

Anywhere but here

We have all faced a moment in time when we were stuck somewhere and thought we would rather be anywhere in the world right now, other than where we are.

For whatever reason, where you are is no longer resonating with you and that nagging feeling in your soul that life could be live differently starts to pound unrelentingly.

We idealise lives in far away, exotic places. We imagine vibrant communities of happy people surrounded by laughter and wine as the good times in foreign land roll on endlessly.

Everyone faces this at some point in their lives.

It’s important though to remember that when you are feeling this way, that the grass isn’t always as green as you think. The glamorous photos you’ve seen on social media, the happy smiles, the cliffs falling away to the ocean are all staged. Enhanced. Filtered. They are not real life. They are a snapshot in an instant of time. The very best moment and then some. Edited to illicit maximum effect and envy.

A friend told me yesterday about someone taking a selfie on the rocks at Ben Buckler point at North Bondi. A beautiful piece of coastline with crisp blue water where people can dive in off the rocks only 20 minutes from Sydney’s CBD. This person taking a selfie, put his arm up in front of his head and beamed with the most radiant smile he could muster, eyes alight as though he was truly having the most wonderful time. Only to then drop the camera down and his face instantly returned to the snarl, downward turned frown and he continued his walk along the coastal rocks.

It was a funny image to consider. The difference between what he portrayed online to his social media buddies and then the actual reality.

There are more and more disturbing statistics coming out about how toxic social media can be We are being socially conditioned by these platforms and we are still not clear on the ramifications of this conditioning. There is already evidence of rising levels of anxiety, depression and youth suicide with social media frequently cited as one of the factors contributing to this growing sense of unease amongst young people.

So I guess the point of this post is to encourage us all to remember to be present and appreciate what we have in the here and now. We can dream of far off, exotic places and think how much better our lives would be if we were there, but the reality is often not quite as it is being idealised in your head.

That said, if you have an unrelenting desire to go travel, or buy the latest tech gadget or check out the hot new bar opening, do it!

Life is both long and short. You will always have plenty of time to pick back up where you were in that career if you decide you need to pack up and go. But life is also short in that you don’t want to sit around wondering what if and then get too far down the track that you never end up doing what your heart desires.

Sometimes we may think we wish we were anywhere but here, but while we are here, let’s appreciate the moment, be thankful for the past and raise a toast to the future.

When it’s ok to be selfish

A loss of self love is something that can happen to us all.

We get in a relationship that undermines our self worth and  begin to question everything we are doing. We are told by the person we love that what we are doing is wrong. We try to give even more until there is nothing left to give. And then when the person leaves there is nothing left. We have to build our self worth back up from nothing.

The problem with being self sacrificing is that it’s pretty easy to lose your own self in the process. You are filling up someones cup up with whatever you have left and you are not restoring your own. You are simply just losing your own power.

While this may help this person, it becomes fundamentally toxic to yourself and incredibly depleting to your own self identity.

Self love was something I never understood until recently. I was always under the impression that self love and narcissism went hand in hand. Being selfless was the better, altruistic, more noble thing to do in any situation or relationship. I thought it was my role as a man, the protector. Get on with it. Sacrifice the self for the good of the relationship, family.

After going through the above journey, I have now learnt that self love is the first and most fundamental step to having a healthy relationship. Love yourself first and foremost.

 

Be more selfish

If you’re a giver, always

looking out for others,

always feeling drained

because you break

yourself so others can

stay together, take a

break from it. Add value

to your own life first.

Add self-love and peace

to your life first.

– s. mcnutt

Dealing with the holidays alone

The holidays are always a time when we reflect on the year that was and come together to spend time with those we love and care about.

It’s a time full of emotions, particularly when we are feeling the absence of a loved one as we can’t help but think back to where we were the year before and the plans that we had made that have since changed.

It’s important to try not to focus on the past too much and use the time to think about the new path ahead, completing the cycle and releasing any energetic strands that are still holding onto you. It’s only once we have fully disentangled and released these strands that we are able to come fully back into our own power.

Be kind to yourself. It’s ok to feel.

There is a wonderful new year lying ahead of you, full of opportunity, ready for the person far more powerful with the knowledge of all of the lessons you have learned.

Moving forward

We all get stuck in the past some times.

Certain times in life are harder than others due to a range of different reasons.

We might be feeling more stuck at work. There might be more financial pressure. Or we are having more difficulty in relationships.

There are always plenty of different reasons that arise in life that contribute to how we are feeling.

Emotion is energy in motion. If we have an energy blockage, or are trapped in a certain part of our life then sometimes that emotion can pool up inside us and we struggle to release it.

It can sit there for much longer than it needs to and that’s when it starts to create problems.

Often the answer is simply time. Time and the acceptance that things are the way they are right now but they won’t always be that way. Acceptance that things will change and they will get better.

You just need to work on the areas where you are feeling stuck, Start turning that ship around. Sometimes it’s really hard. Especially if you’ve been sailing that ship in the wrong direction for a long time. But the great news here is that once you make that effort to turn it around and you start heading in the right direction things will start getting better pretty quickly.

Life’s journey is like a cargo ship. Each piece of cargo is an excuse. A trapped emotion. A failure. The weight of the cargo ship getting heavier and heavier as we travel along. We will always be taking on more cargo regardless of what direction we are headed. That is just the cargo of life.

But the further off course we are and the more cargo we’ve taken on over time, the more effort is required to turn that ship around.

Just something to think about.

Image result for turning oil tanker

Commitment to minimalism

I’ve been a fan of the minimalist genre for some time.

The problem for me is that I haven’t been able to really stick to it.

I’m more of the hoarder mentality type. Where I carry around absolute crap because I have some guilt around throwing it out or something. It overwhelms the fuck out of me.

Anyway.

Keep putting it out there.

I’m renewing a commitment to minimalism.

 

O

 

The seed in the darkness

We all know that life doesn’t always go as planned.

There are curveballs thrown at you. There are periods where we are up and periods where we are down.

Learning how to navigate these ebbs and flows is all part of the process and something we have to deal with until our last breath.

Along the journey, it’s important to remind ourselves that it is in these challenges that we grow the most. It is in the darkness that we are forced to look at our flaws and weaknesses in a process of self examination sprung out of sheer necessity.

A seed before germination spends the start of it’s life in darkness. Deep in the soil, buried, it is unassuming in it’s potential. But it is only from this darkness, from deep under the earth, that it can begin it’s journey and start it’s evolution into a beautiful tree.

Pushing the boat out

I’ve been going through a spiritual awakening the last 6 months that has led me to create this blog as an outlet for some of the things that happen to me along my journey.

So far there have been a lot of changes and I am awakened to how far out of alignment my life has become.

The challenge for me at the moment is not to see this as wasted time but a new opportunity. Learning to leave the past as the past and open my heart and mind to the here and now, walking this new direction.

There are a lot of things pulling me back into my old life. A lot of fears, a lot of temptations, a lot of opportunities that are presenting themselves that are trying to keep me trapped in that old way of living. Which is where lies the challenge. Recognising and resisting those things popping up and saying no to them. Saying no to certainty and embracing a new direction. Embracing complete uncertainty even when you have doubts. When what you are about to do is only a vague plan littered with a series of questions.

It’s a scary thought. An intoxicating thought. And one that comes with a lot of risk. But why would I not take it?

After everything i’ve learnt I know that to continue along a path of certainty is to stagnate. If we are not growing we are dying.What is the point of a life lived out of alignment?

So then with that truth, I reaffirm my commitment. I reaffirm the plan to leave the status quo and forge off into a new direction. Forge ahead into a life lived in alignment with your values. A plan to embrace uncertainty and let everything unfold in it’s new direction. As it should.

If I gave you a million dollars

We can read books. Listen to podcasts. Take courses. But there comes a point in time where all the messages blur into one big grey mix of the same thing.

Find your purpose. Live in alignment. Live according to your values. Bla bla bla.

The messages come in and bounce off. Some of them stick. But very few turn into consistent action over time.

So why is that?

Fear? Fear of failure? Fear of making the wrong move? Fear of disappointing people? Fear of not keeping up with others?

Fear paralyses us into inaction and keeps us locked in the status quo.

Which leads me to the question, if I gave you a million dollars, would you still be doing what you’re doing?

Most people would say no. The very few, the lucky ones, would say hell yes, absolutely.

That’s the point then isn’t it? You would want to be in that place where if you did stumble across a fortune you say thanks a lot! This will really help me along my journey but I don’t need to change what i’m currently doing and start again. I am already on my path.

It’s probably why you find people in poorer rural communities often happier than those living in the western rat race. They aren’t competing with anyone else. They understand where they are and they know and appreciate the moments that make up life. Sure, they would love some more money to make things more comfortable for themselves and their family, but most of them know that if they had it, it wouldn’t really change how they feel about themselves or what they are doing in their life.

It reminds me of the Paulo Coelho story, the fisherman and the businessman. Or even the statistical correlation between money and happiness that lands it around $75,000 a year and beyond that the two no longer correlate.

Image result for happiness correlation with income

 

I think the learning would be to stop competing. Move out of operating and making decisions based from your ego self (impossible for 90% of people) and think about what does a meaningful life look like to you? Ask yourself, ‘Will I be happy if I’m still where I am today in 1-5-20 years?’

Don’t get distracted by the matrix world we live in. You don’t have to be a cog in the machine because if you are stuck in the rat race, regardless of winning or losing, in the end you’re still a rat.

 

References:

http://paulocoelhoblog.com/2015/09/04/the-fisherman-and-the-businessman/

http://www.caixabankresearch.com/en/money-does-not-bring-happiness-does-it-help