A loss of self love is something that can happen to us all.
We get in a relationship that undermines our self worth and begin to question everything we are doing. We are told by the person we love that what we are doing is wrong. We try to give even more until there is nothing left to give. And then when the person leaves there is nothing left. We have to build our self worth back up from nothing.
The problem with being self sacrificing is that it’s pretty easy to lose your own self in the process. You are filling up someones cup up with whatever you have left and you are not restoring your own. You are simply just losing your own power.
While this may help this person, it becomes fundamentally toxic to yourself and incredibly depleting to your own self identity.
Self love was something I never understood until recently. I was always under the impression that self love and narcissism went hand in hand. Being selfless was the better, altruistic, more noble thing to do in any situation or relationship. I thought it was my role as a man, the protector. Get on with it. Sacrifice the self for the good of the relationship, family.
After going through the above journey, I have now learnt that self love is the first and most fundamental step to having a healthy relationship. Love yourself first and foremost.
Be more selfish
If you’re a giver, always
looking out for others,
always feeling drained
because you break
yourself so others can
stay together, take a
break from it. Add value
to your own life first.
Add self-love and peace
to your life first.
– s. mcnutt